


In Front of Love, I'll Finally Shine

by goyangiprince



Category: Pentagon (Korea Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Getting Together, M/M, Soft feelings, WHY DOES NOBODY SHIP THIS???, briefly also featuring SVT Vernon, extreme fluff, huidawn in the background, they're so cute, why did I get into this fandom and immediately fall for a ship that NOBODY SHIPS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-13 22:01:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14757092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goyangiprince/pseuds/goyangiprince
Summary: Hyunggu has always been good at keeping his feelings in check and not letting crushes on cute boys--cute group members--get out of hand, but it’s a lot easier when said boys are clueless and straight, not six foot tall, adorable Chinese boys whose good looks could put any model to shame.





	In Front of Love, I'll Finally Shine

_How can anyone be so cute?_

Hyunggu smiles to himself as Yanan takes a bite of another dumpling and makes the happiest little noise he's ever heard. _Shit._ Hyunggu catches himself staring and quickly shoves some vegetables in his mouth before Yanan notices. 

Yanan had discovered this little authentic Chinese place in the back streets of their neighborhood online a few days ago. He'd been begging the members to try it with him, and well, Hyunggu has never been able to turn down those puppy eyes. He’d ordered a bunch of food excitedly-- _This eggplant dish is really popular in Shanghai, Hyunggu you have to try it, and oh we have to get dumplings of course, and this egg dish is really good_ \--probably way more than two people would normally eat, but Yanan’s enthusiasm was endearing. The food really was incredible, even with none of the Korean-ized Chinese food like jjajangmyeon or jjamppong in sight, and the way Yanan’s eyes lit up when it came out was like nothing Hyunggu had ever seen from him before. 

“It's really delicious, isn't it?” Hyunggu asks fondly, and Yanan nods.

“It's been a long time since I've had food like this,” Yanan manages to say excitedly between bites. “It really reminds me of home.”

Hyunggu nods. “You really have been here a long time.” An unspoken _it's hard on you_ , lingers as they caught each other’s eyes, but Yanan shrugs, still happily eating.

“I really like it here though. Before I became a trainee I was just studying hard and working. I didn't have time for myself at all.” 

“I still feel like that now,” Hyunggu laughs.

“Korea feels different to me, though. I'm just as busy, twice as busy, even, but I think I needed to be on my own to figure myself out. And then you guys all helped me too,” he says, offering Hyunggu a small smile.

Hyunggu grins, playfully grabbing Yanan’s hand from across the table. “You're welcome~” he says. “I know I'm amazing.”

Yanan rolls his eyes, feigning annoyance to cover up his flustered smile. “Don't let it go to your head.”

Hyunggu just hums happily, pleased to get a reaction out of him. He grabs some more food-- _how can they make just eggs and vegetables taste so good?_ \--and settles back in his seat. Yanan looks lost in thought, quiet as he grabs some more food too. 

“Actually….I kind of have been wanting to tell you something. You know, in a way you've especially helped me,” he admits, after a moment.

 _Huh? I helped him?_ Hyunggu was confused. It's not like he _hadn't_ helped Yanan, he never minded patiently explaining words or helping him do things, and they'd become close over time for sure, but they all had.

“Me?” Hyunggu asks, looking at Yanan closely. Yanan goes quiet again, trying to find the right words to say.

“Yeah. You're always just so confident, you know? I wanted that too, so you kind of… encouraged me to come to terms with my own sexuality too.” 

Oh.

_OH._

Yanan starts running his hands through his hair like he always does when he's nervous, starts babbling before Hyunggu gets a chance to speak. “Ah, shit, that was sudden, I--”

“Yanan--” Hyunggu starts before they're suddenly interrupted by the little old lady who runs the restaurant coming up with a huge smile and plopping a plate full of meat on their table. 

“On the house,” she says in heavily accented Korean to Hyunggu, before turning to Yanan and cooing over him in Mandarin, fussing over his hair and quickly making him turn red from embarrassment. 

Hyunggu can't help but grin at the sight as he tries the food, because she's right, Yanan kind of is the cutest person he's ever seen. Even though he's older than Hyunggu, he's never felt quite like a hyung--between the culture differences and his overall aura of innocence, Hyunggu has always had a soft spot for Yanan--a _crush,_ if he's honest with himself, even if he never let his feelings go quite that far. Yanan was always so cute, so earnest and hardworking, competitive in the same way Hyunggu was but so kind, so ridiculous and funny sometimes that he always put a smile on Hyunggu’s face.

“Is it good?” the lady asks, turning back to Hyunggu. 

“It's delicious,” he assures her, and she beams at him before leaving them alone. Yanan ends up running his hands through his hair again, taking a deep breath before he looks up at Hyunggu again.

“She can't speak Korean well, don't worry,” he starts with, more to reassure himself than Hyunggu that she wasn't eavesdropping, it sounded like. 

“Yanan,” Hyunggu says calmingly. “It's okay.” A grin suddenly spreads across his face. “So. Just guys? Or girls too?” he asks.

“How can you be so….I don't know the word,” Yanan sighs. “This isn't a big deal?”

“It _is_ a big deal. But it's also not,” Hyunggu shrugs. In truth, it had taken him years to accept the fact that he was gay, surrounded by hate growing up for his interests. But Hyunggu was lucky to find a few close friends who accepted him, both in his group and outside of it, and he’s happy that he can be that kind of person for Yanan, too.

“Just guys….” Yanan says, slightly less hesitantly. He’s slowly getting more comfortable now that he’s admitted everything, but his ears are still bright red.

“I guess that explains why you never dated anyone,” Hyunggu says. “I knew there had to be a reason. You’re too handsome to have not had a girlfriend.”

Yanan rolls his eyes, but a blush is creeping up across his cheeks. “I dated a girl friend of mine once, actually,” he admits, “but it was over quickly. It just didn’t feel right, I couldn’t do it.”

“I can imagine,” Hyunggu empathises. “I was pretty lucky that I went to an arts high school with other gay kids and it wasn’t really a big deal.”

“I wish I could be more like that,” Yanan sighs, and then lets out an empty laugh. “You’re one of the only people who actually knows,” he says.

“Changgu knows?” Hyunggu guesses.

“Hyojong too, actually,” Yanan says with a smile. “He knows everything about everyone.” 

“That’s true,” Hyunggu laughs. “I don’t think I even had to tell him either.” he says, reaching for another dumpling. They had ended up with a ridiculous amount of food, but practice always left them both starving. They let their conversation turn back to their everyday subjects and eventually make their way out, the owner taking the opportunity to chat with Yanan once more as they pay. 

“She says you’re handsome too,” Yanan tells him, and Hyunggu immediately shoots the lady his most charming smile and bows to thank her. She seems thrilled, beaming at him before telling Yanan something. Yanan suddenly almost bursts out laughing, stopping himself and nodding at her with a grin before they finally head out.

“What did she tell you?” Hyunggu asks when they’re out the door.

Yanan giggles. “She wants you to come back again when her daughter is working, she says she’s single.” 

Hyunggu also cracks up, clinging to Yanan’s arm as they walk together. It’s a normal thing for them to do, but his thoughts are weighing heavily on his mind as they make their way back. He wants to assure Yanan that nothing has changed, but at the same time, if he’s honest with himself, everything kind of has. Hyunggu can’t keep himself from imagining that this could be _normal_ now, that they could do all this as more than friends. He’d always been good at controlling his feelings normally and not letting crushes on cute boys--cute _group members_ \--get out of hand, but it’s a lot easier when said boys are clueless and straight, not six foot tall, adorable Chinese boys whose good looks could put any model to shame.

He quickly shoves those thoughts away, grabbing Yanan’s hand and dragging him towards the company building. “Come on, we gotta get back to practice,” he tells him, flashing him a grin and ignoring the butterflies that flutter when Yanan smiles back.

 

 

The next few weeks get easier as the preparations for the comeback get harder. Or at least, that’s what Hyunggu tells himself. All Hyunggu has to do is ignore clingy, tired Yanan on the way home from practice, ignore sweaty, focused Yanan trying his hardest to master all the moves, ignore almost topless Yanan in bed during their photoshoot….

Hyunggu sighs. He’s so fucked. He knows he has to talk to Yanan alone somehow, but on the other hand, keeping everything the same feels so much _easier_. Their relationship hasn’t changed at all--they still cuddle on the couch watching movies, still go out to lunch together, but there’s this underlying feeling that Hyunggu just can’t shake, one that makes his heart do a little flippy thing every time he catches Yanan’s eyes.

God _damn_ it.

 

 

There's always a few days before comeback when things suddenly slow down just a bit, once the album is recorded, the photos are taken, the choreography rehearsed so many times they could do it in their sleep. It’s almost like the calm before the storm, Hyunggu always thought. If there was ever a time to talk to Yanan, it was probably now.

At least, that's what Hyunggu thought until Yanan walks into practice sleepily clinging to Changgu’s back like a six foot tall koala. It's irrational, Hyunggu knows, but that's all it takes for doubt to creep in and a weird feeling to twist in his chest.

 _I'm not jealous,_ Hyunggu insists to himself, _I'm just...._

 

 **Hansol - 10:27am**  
jealous, much?

 

Hyunggu immediately regrets confiding in his friend.

 

 **Hyunggu - 10:28am**  
No!

 **Hansol - 10:30am**  
just talk to him, dude

 **Hyunggu - 10:31am**  
speak for your fuckin self choi hansol

 

It came as a small comfort that his best friend was equally as hopeless at love, at least. Hansol could get back to him when he stopped doodling _Mr. Boo Hansol_ on his notebooks or whatever that asshole did in his spare time.

Hyunggu glances over at Yanan, who is currently giggling cutely at something Channgu said. He sighs internally, but flashes Yanan a smile like always. Worst case scenario, he should at least try to be a supportive friend, right?

When Yanan pops out to get a drink at the convenience store, Hyunggu jumps on the chance and runs up behind him to tag along. He pokes Yanan’s side teasingly.

“Soooo…” he says, trying to act casual. “What do you think about Changgu?” 

Yanan opens the refrigerator door to grab his drink. “What do I _think_ about him?” he asks, confused.

“You know,” Hyunggu says, wiggling his eyebrows to hint what he means when Yanan closes the door and looks back at him. “Do you like him?”

“Oh,” Yanan immediately makes a face. “No way. He's my _best friend_ , Hyunggu.” 

Hyunggu laughs, putting his hands up defensively. “Hey, I’m just wondering,” he says, hoping he didn't sound suspiciously relieved by that answer. “I mean, you've basically kissed him before,” he says, attempting to deflect.

“It was a game, there’s no way Wooseok and Shinwon were gonna beat me,” Yanan says seriously.

“Fair point,” Hyunggu agrees, all the while mentally berating himself. _Why did I even say that? Yeah, it's totally normal to care that much about a stupid game your friend did years ago. Idiot._

“What kind of guys _do_ you like?” Hyunggu suddenly says on the way back to practice, his mouth working faster than his brain can stop him. Might as well throw all subtlety out the window at this point.

Yanan freezes, suddenly flustered. He runs his hands through his hair in thought, ears already turning red in embarrassment.

“I, uhh--”

The practice room door suddenly swings open and Hwitaek pops out, looking relieved to see them. 

“Get your asses back in here, we have an evaluation in ten minutes,” he sighs, sounding stressed even though Hyunggu knows they're beyond ready for the comeback. 

“Well, let's go then,” Hyunggu offers Yanan a small smile of encouragement, fixing his hair for him and pushing him inside. He'll just have to get Yanan alone some other time. 

 

 

To Hyunggu’s surprise, it’s Hyojong who manages to get him alone first a few days later, dropping the question casually as they take a few minutes break from practicing in the dance studio late one night.

“There’s something with you and Yanan, isn’t there?” he asks suddenly when he sits down against the wall beside him, and Hyunggu freezes. He shouldn’t be surprised that Hyojong knows everyone’s business--often before they even know it themselves. It’s disconcerting every time, frustrating even, because _sometimes secrets are secrets for a reason, fuck you, Hyojong._

“I’m right, aren’t I,” Hyojong continues, amused.

‘I swear to god, I hate you so much,” Hyunggu mumbles under his breath. “But....you’re right. I mean I've always kind of liked him, and suddenly he came out to me a while ago, and it just made the feelings I already had so much worse. I _really_ like him, hyung. I’m fucked. I didn’t even know I had it this bad. Did I always?”

“It’s taken you long enough to realize it,” Hyojong says, and Hyunggu doesn’t know if he’s referring to Yanan’s sexuality or his own horrible crush, but he supposes it doesn’t actually matter. Everything was fucked.

“Why haven’t you told him?” Hyojong challenges, and Hyunggu just sighs. 

“I don’t want to ruin it,” he admits. “It would fuck everything up.”

“No it wouldn’t,” Hyojong says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. Hyunggu supposes it is, for him. After all, it’s not like his relationship with Hwitaek changed anything. All it changed was that they suddenly felt like they could be disgustingly cute in _front_ of people now. 

But they were friends for about a thousand years before they finally got together, and it was obvious that they had been mutually in love with each other for at least half of that time. Nothing like him and Yanan.

Right?

“You might be surprised,” Hyojong says, snapping Hyunggu out of his train of thought as if he was reading his mind. “You should just go for it.” He grins at Hyunggu, giving him a corny double thumbs up.

Hyunggu groans loudly and slumps down onto the practice floor. “Can I just. Not. It’s too hard,” he complains. “How did you and Hwitaek hyung even get together?” 

“Uh.” Hyojong pauses. “We slept together, and then Hwitaek burst into tears after a few days and confessed everything, and I told him he was an idiot.” Hyojong grins. “Kinda backwards, as these things go.”

“Gross, forget I asked,” Hyunggu says, making a horrified face at Hyojong. He didn’t need to imagine any of that. It’s like knowing too much about your parents.

Hyojong laughs. “Just ask him, so I can stop watching you stare at him longingly all day.”

“I do _not_ stare,” Hyunggu protests, but he knows it’s useless. Hyojong is right, as usual. He’s going to have to confess eventually. 

“I’ll do it,” he says decidedly, sitting up. “I’ll fucking do it. It’ll be the best fucking confession ever,” he says, like it’s a challenge against...no one, clearly, since Hyojong is suddenly distracted by someone texting him, Hwitaek probably. 

“Sounds perfect,” Hyojong says without looking up from his phone.

 _Whatever,_ Hyunggu thinks, he didn’t need him anyways. _I can plan a confession all by myself. I’ve watched plenty of dramas. Would a dance routine be too much? Flowers? Taking him to a puppy cafe?_

Hyunggu is so lost in thought that he almost jumps a foot in the air when someone taps him on the shoulder. He turns and a familiar smile looks down at him, freezing him on the spot. 

“Hyojongie hyung said you’d be in here,” Yanan says, sitting on the floor in front of him.

Hyunggu just stares at him stupidly for a minute. _When did he even get in here? When did Hyojong leave?_ What the _fuck,_ Yanan.

“What were you up to?” Yanan asks.

“Just practice….messing around with some choreography for one of the songs,” Hyunggu tells him.

“Can I see? I want to know what you’re gonna torture us with,” Yanan teases.

“Ah...okay. It’s nowhere near finished, though,” Hyunggu explains. He’s a little flustered, his ears turning red as he can feel all of Yanan’s attention on him. Yanan grins up at him and claps excitedly even before the music starts, so cutely that Hyunggu misses the first move of the song. _If he could just stop being so goddamn adorable for once, that would be great,_ Hyunggu thinks to himself, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath to focus.

He quickly loses himself to the music, moving to the beat and letting it flow through him without thinking about it. He had been pouring his heart into this particular song, wanting the chance to prove himself again as a dancer and choreographer, and he was pretty happy with how it was turning out. He had only finished about half of the song, though, so he when he eventually stops around the second verse, the weight of Yanan’s gaze on him returns and he flushes with embarrassment again. 

“Uh, yeah, that’s it so far,” he explains awkwardly, quickly going over to turn off the music. When he looks back at Yanan, Hyunggu notices that his eyes have never left him the whole time. There was something there that Hyunggu had never seen-- _never noticed?_ \--before, and it made him feel so flustered. Maybe Hyojong was right…

“That was beautiful,” Yanan says with his smile that always makes Hyunggu’s heart explode. He grabs Hyunggu’s hand and pulls him back down to sit beside him. “ _You_ were beautiful.”

“Me?” Hyunggu asks, pointing at himself for emphasis. It’s not like they'd never told each other similar things before, but somehow, there’s something in Yanan’s words that makes everything feel different. Hyunggu feels like his face is on fire now, but he can see that Yanan’s cheeks are flushed too. Hyunggu thinks it’s one of the most adorable things he’s ever seen in his whole life. “Really?”

“Really,” Yanan assures him. He looks away, suddenly flustered himself. “I’ve wanted to tell you that for a long time now. I--I _really_ like you, Hyunggu.”

Hyunggu starts laughing at that, at the ridiculousness of the whole situation, he can’t help it. He had spent so long in his own head trying to figure out exactly what to say to Yanan, but Yanan just blurted it all out at once instead. It was so blunt and _just like him,_ honestly. Hyunggu has no idea what Yanan was even talking about when he said he wanted to be confident like him, when it's Hyunggu that has been reduced to a mess these days just by Yanan’s existence, and Yanan who has finally managed to get the words out. 

Yanan looks slightly confused at his sudden outburst, so Hyunggu grabs his hand tight and brings it towards his own chest, trying to express his feelings sincerely.

“Me too. Really. I really wanted to tell you myself, but in the end I guess you beat me to it,” Hyunggu admits, grinning.

Yanna smiles back at him so widely that Hyunggu feels like his heart is going to burst into a million pieces.

“Can I kiss you now, then?” Yanan asks, still sounding slightly nervous. It’s so cute, so pure that Hyunggu can’t help but giggle. 

“Yes, of course,” he says, closing his eyes as Yanan closes the distance between them. His lips are soft, hesitant, pressing against Hyunggu’s for just a moment before he can feel Yanan grin against him. He pulls away with a stupidly happy look on his face, and Hyunggu tilts his head at him in confusion. 

“Really?” Yanan asks again. “You'll really be my boyfriend?”

Hyunggu laughs. “You're adorable. And ridiculous.”

Hyunggu’s the one who leans in to kiss him this time, holding Yanan’s face like it's the most precious thing in the world. It's much deeper this time, all their hesitations thrown out the window. He pushes Yanan up against the wall, climbing into his lap and grinning when Yanan’s hands fall to his hips, holding him close. Kissing Yanan for real is somehow a thousand times better than Hyunggu had even dared to imagine, with both of them so eager and excited. Hyunggu had waited so long for this, and knowing that Yanan had felt exactly the same way for god knows how long made his heart burst. 

“I'm an idiot, I should have done this so much sooner,” Hyunggu tells him between kisses, and Yanan just laughs. 

Suddenly, Hyunggu jumps at the sound of the door opening, quickly pulling away to sit next to Yanan and look completely innocent, like they were just breathless from practice instead of kissing each other senseless.

Hyojong pokes his head into the room, and immediately, a knowing grin spreads across his face.

“Fuck yes,” he says, “Hwitaek owes me twenty thousand won. Anyways, I left my water bottle in here, that's all,” he explains, grabbing it and walking back towards the door while Hyunggu just stares wordlessly at him. Yanan seems to be similarly confused.

“Wait, I forgot to take a proof shot,” Hyojong says, pulling out his phone and snapping a picture of himself, cutely flashing a v sign with Hyunggu and Yanan clearly looking a little disheveled in the background.

“I'm going to _kill_ you,” Hyunggu threatens, leaping at him to reach for the phone. Hyojong just cracks up, easily keeping it away.

“Too late~” Hyojong says. “Stay safe kiddos, use protection!” he singsongs, bolting out the door faster than Hyunggu had ever seen him move before.

Hyunggu sighs angrily at the door, but when Yanan comes up behind him, head resting on his shoulder and arms wrapped around his waist, his frustration quickly melts away. Honestly, he shouldn't be surprised at Hyojong being ridiculous anymore.

“Why are you so cute,” he asks Yanan, who just buries his head in Hyunggu’s neck and clings to him tighter. It doesn't do anything to change Hyunggu’s mind, in fact it only makes him that much cuter. He reaches back to pat Yanan’s head.

“We should go home anyways,” he says softly, and Yanan mumbles something in agreement. Hyunggu smiles softly, simply dragging his clingy boyfriend _(boyfriend!)_ along with him. They reach the dorms much too quickly, and Hyunggu suddenly regrets the fact that they live in separate apartments. 

Yanan is looking equally pouty, and Hyunggu can’t help but tiptoe up for a quick kiss. Yanan grins, still refusing to let go of Hyunggu’s hand. 

“You know, I never answered you,” he says. “About what kind of guys I like. I like cute boys...dancers...guys who are really kind to everyone...much more outgoing than me...kinda sensitive-- _ow_ ,” Yanan cracks up when Hyunggu playfully punches his arm. “Short guys…”

Hyunggu’s eyes go wide and he hits him again. “I’m not even short! Just because I’m not a fucking _tree_ for no reason,” he mumbles, Yanan still laughing the whole time.

“I mentioned sensitive, right?” he grins.

“You’re a jerk,” Hyunggu insists, shutting him up with another kiss and finally wishing him good night. When he walks into his room, he feels like he’s floating, completely ignoring all of Shinwon’s mess in favor of flopping on his bed and grinning stupidly at the ceiling. 

“That was the most disgusting display of affection I’ve been the unfortunate witness to since I caught Hwitaek feeding Hyojong this morning,” Shinwon complains from across the room. Hyunggu just chucks a pillow at his idiot roommate’s head, but his heart is still fluttering too fast to plan murder right now, Shinwon would have to wait. 

“Why were you even eavesdropping?” Hyunggu mumbles, cheeks flushed in embarrassment. 

Shinwon ignores him, tossing the pillow back at Hyunggu with a devious looking grin on his face.

“You know, next time you can let me know if you two need the room free, I’ll find somewhere else to sleep,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows at Hyunggu for effect.

_...on second thought, do we really need him around anyways?_

**Author's Note:**

> If I even get one of y'all to ship YanGu (as named by Yanan himself lol) this is a success. I need people to cry with me about how goshdarn CUTE they are always??? this ship is quality as heck
> 
> Title from Pentagon's "Shine"!
> 
> Comments are always appreciated! ♡ You can also find me on [twitter](http://twitter.com/goyangiprince) or [cc](https://curiouscat.me/goyangiprince)! please feel free to come and chat/cry/scream about Pentagon with me :D


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